Be A Comfort
Job 16: 2-4
To say that I have had periods of deep mourning over the past two years would be an understatement. The sudden loss of my stepson followed a year later by the loss of my mother-in-law has been significant in my life. However, I know my grief is nothing in comparison to that of my husbands. His grief is much deeper than mine. My solitary role in all of it is to comfort him. It would do us no good for me to tell him anything about moving on, or as time passes it will get better. It would be similar to what Job's friends were doing and to say the least it was of no comfort to him. It is not my place to say any of that, the simple fact is I have no right to tell someone else how to grieve.
As I have read through Job this week, I am learning that this man that had loss everything, was in deep mourning and had some of the worse advice from his closest friends. I read today about how poor of a job they did at comforting him. They were trying to help by calling him out, or saying there must be something you did to deserve this, but ultimately the best thing they ever did was when they sat in silence with him for the first seven days.
One day about a year ago I realized I have been given the privilege of comforting my husband during what is probably one of the worst times he has experienced in his life. I do not take this privilege lightly. If you have been given this gift to give someone comfort then just sit there in silence with them. Go down into that dark pit that they are sitting in, hold their hand, hug them and reassure them that you will sit their in their pain with them. You will cry and it will rip your heart out to see someone you love so much hurting and knowing you cannot take that pain away. They do not need you to take it away, God will manage that, you need to just be with them and let them know despite it all they are deeply loved. Be a comfort in the midst of pain and grief, listen to them and love them.
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